ALL TIED UP & STRUNG ALONG: HOLLYWOOD STRING THEORY MOVIE!!! LOOKING FOR EXTRAS!!!

[astro]

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
http://revver.com/video/48391/ (WATCH IT!)
http://revver.com/video/48391/ (WATCH IT!)

ALL TIED UP & STRUNG ALONG, a movie about String Theorists and their expansive theories which extend human ignorance, pomposity, and frailty into higher dimensions, is set to start filming this fall. Jessica Alba, John Cleese, Eugene Levie, Jackie Chan, and David Duchovney of X-files fame have all signed on to the $700 million Hollywood project, which is still cheaper than String Theory itself, and will likely displace less physicists from the academy.


http://physicsmathforums.com/brianGreene.jpghttp://physicsmathforums.com/David_Duchovny.jpg

"As contemporary physics is about money, hype, mythology, and chicks," Ed Witten explained from his offices at the Princeton Institute for Advanced Study, "The next logical step was Hollywood, although I thought Burt Reynolds should play me instead of Eugene Levy."

http://physicsmathforums.com/180px-Ed-witten-crop.jpghttp://physicsmathforums.com/t04i-10-163.jpg


Brian Greene, the famous String Theorist who will be played by David "the truth is out there" Duchovney, explained the plot: "String theory's muddled, contorted theories that lack postulates, laws, and experimentally-verified equations have Einstein spinning so fast in his grave that it creates a black hole. In order to save the world, we String Theorists have to stop reformulating String Theory faster than the speed of light. We are called upon to stop violating the conservation of energy by mining higher dimensions to publish more BS than can accounted for with the Big Bang alone, and I win the Nobel prize for showing that M-Theory is in fact the dark matter it has been searching for."

http://physicsmathforums.com/alba-invisible-woman.jpg

Greene continues: "At first my character is reluctant to stop theorizing and start postulating, but when my love interest Jessica Alba is sucked into the black hole, I search my soul and find Paul Davies there, played by John Cleese. I ask him what he's doing in my soul, and he explains that the answer is contained in the mind of God, which only he is privy too, but for a small fee, some tax and tuition dollars, a couple grants here and there, and an all-expense-paid book tour with stops in Zurich and Honolulu, he can let me in on it. And he shows me God in all her greater glory, as he points out that we can make more money in Hollywood than writing coffee-table books that recycle Einstein, Bohr, Dirac, Feynman, and Wheeler. I am quickly converted, and I agree to turn my back on String Theory's hoax and save Jessica Alba."

http://physicsmathforums.com/Paul_Davies.jpghttp://physicsmathforums.com/monty_python_im1.jpg

But it's not that easy, as standing in Greene's way is Michio "king of pop-theory-hipster-irony-the-theory-of-everything-or-anything-made-
you-read-this" Kaku, played by Jackie Chan. Kaku beats the crap out of Greene for alomst blowing the "ironic" pretense his salary, benefits, and all-expense paid trips depend on. "WE MUST HOLD BACK THE YOUNG SCIENTISTS WITH OUR NON-THEORIES!! WE MUST FILL THE ACADEMY WITH THE POMO DARK MATTER THAT IS STRING THEORY TO KEEP OUR UNIVERSE FROM FLYING APART, OUR PYRAMID SCHEMES FROM TOPPLING, AND OUR PERPETUAL-MOTION NSF MONEY MACHINE FROM STOPPING!!" Kaku argues as he delivers a flying back-kick, "There can be ony ONE! I WILL be String Theory's GODFATHER as referenced on my web page!! I have better hair!"

But Greene fights back as he signs his seventeenth book deal to make the hand-waving incoherence of String Theory accessible to the South Park generation, senior citizens, and starving chirldren around the world. "Kaku! Kaku! (pronounced Ka-Kaw! Ka-Kaw! like Owen Wilson did in Bottle Rocket)," Greene shouts. "It is theoretically impossible to build a coffee tables strong enough to support any more coffee-table physics books!!!"

"Time travel is also theoretically impossible, but there's a helluva lot more money for us in flushing physics down a wormhole. Nobody knows what the #&#%&$ M stands for in M theory ya hand-waving, TV-hogging crank!!! Get it?? Ha Ha Ha! We're laughing at the public! We're the insider pomo hipsters! Get with the gangsta-wanksta-pranksta CRANKSTER bling-bling program!!"

http://physicsmathforums.com/kaku.jpghttp://physicsmathforums.com/jackie-chan-01.jpg

How does it all end? Does physics go bankrupt funding theories that have expanded our ignorance from four dimensions into ten, twenty, and thirty dimensions? Do tax payers revolt? Do young physicists overthrow the hand-waving, contortionist bullies and revive physics with a classical renaissance favoring logic, reason, and Truth over meaningless mathematical abstractions? Does Moving Dimensions Theory (http://physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=60) (MDT (http://physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=60)) prevail with its simple postulate? We'll all just have to wait!

But in the meantime, how do you think it will play out?

Will theories with postulates ever be allowed in physics again? Or will the well-funded, tenured pomo String Theory / M-Theory (Maffia-Theory) Priests send their armies of desperate, snarky postdocs and starving graduate students forth to displace and destroy all common sense, logic, reason, and physics in the academy? It must be so--for the greater good of physics, the individual physicist, and thus physics, must be sacrificed.

MDT (http://physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=60)'s postulate: THE FOURTH DIMENSION IS EXPANDING AT A RATE OF C RELATIVE TO THE THREE SPATIAL DIMENSIONS IN QUANTIZED UNITS OF THE PLANCK LENGTH, GIVING RISE TO TIME AND ALL CLASSICAL, QUANTUM MECHANICAL, AND RELATIVISTIC PHENOMENA.

http://revver.com/video/48391/ (WATCH IT!)
http://revver.com/video/48391/ (WATCH IT!)

[astro]

BREAKING SCIENCE NEWS:

This year's Nobel prize in physics will go to the first person who can name a single postulate or law of String Theory.

[caltechpostdoc]

:)

this funny :)

[astro]

rock on all ye truth seekers!

[Epsilon=One]

BREAKING SCIENCE NEWS:

This year's Nobel prize in physics will go to the first person who can name a single postulate or law of String Theory.To begin: first the origin of "strings" must be rationalized; then, their composition must be defined; finally, their etiology from beginning motion to particle formation should be described.

Of course, along the way, it would be nice if dimensions, bonds, forces, cyclic conservation, and life fit into the dialogue.

This is all quite possible; but, a prerequisite is the forces of Pomo theoretical physics must be redefined without an assist from the Big Bang or action-at-a-distance.

[caltechpostdoc]

# Dr. Ranger McCoy Says:
November 16th, 2005 at 2:16 pm

Does String Theory have any postulates or laws?

What is the frequency of a string when it is an electron?

What makes a string a proton? A quark? A photon?

Does String Theory account for wave-particle duality or the equivalence of mass and energy?

Moving Dimensions Theory proposes that wave-particle duality and the equivalence of mass and energy stem from the same, simple underlying postulate–the fouth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions.

Which journal publishes theories that come complete with new postulates rooted in logic, reason, and experimental evidence?

[Epsilon=One]

Does String Theory have any postulates or laws?Assuming that “postulates or laws” should be rather fundamental and true, the short answer is: No.

It is nonsensical to consider “postulates or laws” concerning a theory that has the stated purpose of unifying the “conventional” forces, which are, currently, all described as metaphysical.

What is the frequency of a string when it is an electron?I have no idea what you intend by the term “string”; if it has to do with “string” theory the question is nonsensical; as is the theory.

However, electrons are the remnants of a Phorb (http://physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=147), which evolved from a fundamental ellipsoid, that from an anthropoidal viewpoint, has the ultra-large “ellipticalness” of a hyper-relativistic, oscillating (simultaneous slide, swing, and vibration) straight line.

The electron remnant’s frequency would vary in accordance with its system; however, this variance would be imperceptible compared to its near infinite rate of complex oscillation.

What makes a string a proton? A quark? A photon?A proton is a single Phorb (http://physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=147), from which the electron is a remnant after it’s Phorb (http://physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=147) was compressed from the nucleus at Critical Compression (http://www.physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=205) as manifested by quasars and gamma-ray bursts,

A “quark” is a Soloid (http://www.physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=172), the fundamental wave structure of matter; four of which comprise a Phorb (http://physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=147). Soloids (http://www.physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=172) are heuristically represented by the integer diameters of the circles inscribed within right tiangles of Pulsoidal Ellipses (http://www.physicsmathforums.com/showthread.php?t=125).

A “photon,” as a particle, is an illusionary effect produced by the hyper-relativistic oscillations of a fundamental ellipsoid.

Does String Theory account for wave-particle duality or the equivalence of mass and energy?Not that I know of. But, Pulsoid Theory (http://www.physicsmathforums.com/forumdisplay.php?f=63) does.

Moving Dimensions Theory proposes that wave-particle duality and the equivalence of mass and energy stem from the same, simple underlying postulateThis is quite so.

–the fouth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions.This statement is dependent upon the type of “time” considered and its definition . . . as well as the definition of spatial dimensions. Conventional definitions are circular, which adds a layer of difficulty to explaining and understanding MDT.

Which journal publishes theories that come complete with new postulates rooted in logic, reason, and experimental evidence?Excellent query. I know of none. Can others provide some insight?

[astro]

video coming soon!!

[astro]

Ed Witten Seen Reading Lee Smolin's "The Trouble With Physics": NSF Quadruples LQG's Funding, Slashes ST's Funding, and Every University Gets Three LQG Theorists To Talk Amongst Themselves & Give One Another Tenure!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
THE PHYSICS TIMES
Princeton, NJ

Ed Witten was seen reading Lee Smolin's THE TORUBLE WITH PHYSICS while simultaneuosly walking down Nassau Street in an inertial frame, followed by his 137 postdocs, who were chanting in unison.

Some towards the front of the line started crying first, as they realized it was the end of a free ride for blind obedience, and that for health benefits and summers off, they were going to have to hurt themselves by thinking on their own.

The news spread far and wide. Up in Cambridge Lubos Motl changed his snarky two star amazon review for THE TROUBLE WITH PHYSICS to a laudatory five star review, so as to secure future NSF funding. And Michio Kaku added Smolin as a friend at his myspace page, after a call from his media team.

"I've seen darker days than this," Brian Greene smiled. "I already got my two string theory coffee table books out and am set. I know that I have secured the Nobel--in literature."

Witten said, "It is time to make peace. The most important thing that we ST, LQGers, and Not Even Wrongers must do is continue to oppose physical theories, which unify disparate physical phenomena in the same physical framework. Otherwise mathematical masturbation will fall out of favor, and we will have to join the proletariat in working for a living and taking what they're giving."

I wish Woit would have talked more about his views on the future of physics.

String Theory was the only game in town, and now there are two--ST & deconstructing ST.

But there is another that actually unifies QM & SR & GR with a physical model: MDT--it's physics!

Moving Dimensions Theory is in complete agreement with all experimental tests and phenomena associated with special and general relativity. MDT is in complete agreement with all physical phenomena as predicted by quantum mechanics and demonstrated in extensive experiments. The genius and novelty of MDT is that it presents a common physical model which shows that phenomena from both relativity and quantum mechanics derive from the same fundamental physical reality.

Nowhere does String Theory nor Loop Quantum Gravity account for quantum entanglement nor relativistic time dilation. MDT shows these derive from the same underlying physical reality. Nowhere does ST nor LQG account for wave-particle duality nor relativistic length contraction. MDT shows these derive from the same underlying physical reality. Nowhere does ST nor LQG account for the constant speed of light, nor the independence of the speed of light on the velocity of the source, nor entropy, nor time's arrow. MDT shows these derive from the same underlying physical reality. Nowhere does String Theory nor Loop Quantum Gravity resolve the paradox of Godel's Block Universe which troubled Eisntein. MDT resolves this paradox.

Simply put, MDT replaces the contemporary none-theories with a physical theory, complete with a simple postulate that unifies formerly disparate phenomena within a simple context.

THE GENERAL POSTULATE
OF DYNAMIC DIMENSIONS THEORY
The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions.

If at first the idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it.
-Albert Einstein

But after thirty years of the absurdity of String Theory, millions of dollars from the NSF, and billions of complementary dollars from tax and tuition and endowments spent on killing physics and indie physicists, perhaps it's time for something that makes sense-for a physical theory that actually accounts for a deeper reality from which both Relativity and Quantum Mechanics, from which time, entanglement, gravity, entropy, interference, the constant speed of light, relativistic time dilation, length contraction, and the equivalence of mass and energy emerge. It's time for Moving Dimensions Theory-MDT.
-The Physicist with No Name

I know what you're thinking. Did he say there were thirty-six dimensions or only thirty-five? Well to tell you the truth in all this excitement I've kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .45 Revolver-the most powerful hand gun in the world and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question--Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk!? -Clint Eastwood

I'm interested in the fact that the less secure a man is, the more likely he is to have extreme prejudice. -Clint Eastwood

Go ahead. Make my day. -Clint Eastwood

MDT IN BRIEF
Without further adieu, allow me to present the beauty and elegance of MDT by showing both its simplicity and far-reaching ability to account for and answer fundamental questions. All of the below will be elaborated on throughout the book.

Questions Addressed by MDT:

Why does light have a maximum, constant speed independent of the source? The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions. A photon is momenergy that exists orthogonal to the three spatial dimensions. It is carried along by the expanding fourth dimension. So no matter how fast the source is moving when the photon is emitted, the photon travels at the rate with which the fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions. Thus c is always independent of the movement of the source.

Why are light and energy quantized? The fourth dimension is expanding in a quantized manner relative to the three spatial dimensions. Light and energy are matter rotated completely into the fourth expanding dimension, and as it expands in a quantized manner, light and energy are thus quantized.

Why is the velocity of light constant in all frames? Time is an emergent phenomena that arises because the fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions. The flow of time is inextricably wed to the emission and propagation of photons. In all biological, mechanical, and electronic clocks, the emission and propagation of photons is what determines time. The velocity of light is always measured with respect to time, which is inextricably linked to the velocity of light. This tautology ensures that the velocity of light, measured relative to the velocity of light, will always be the same.

How can photons display both wave and particle properties? The fundamental photon propagates as a spherical wave-front, surfing the fourth expanding dimension. This is because the fourth expanding dimension appears as a spherical wavefront as it expands through the three spatial dimensions. The act of measurement localizes the photon's momenergy, taking it out of the expanding fourth dimension and trapping it in the three stationary spatial dimensions, and it appears as a localized particle, trapped by electrons as it blackens a grain on a photographic plate.

How can matter display both wave and particle properties? The fundamental electron is abuzz with photons. Photons are continually being emitted into the fourth expanding dimension and reabsorbed by the electron. The continual dance with these photons gives the electron its wave properties. Nothing moves without photons which up the net probability that the combine momenergy will be in the expanding fourth dimension. The more photons one adds to an object, the greater the chance it has of existing in the expanding fourth dimension, and thus it moves.

Why are there non-local effects in quantum mechanics? The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions. That means that what begins as a point in the fourth dimension is a sphere with a 186,000 mile radius one second later. So it is that the entire spherical wavefront of the photon exists in the exact same place in time. Hence the non-locality observed in double slit experiments, the EPR effect, and quantum entanglement. Take two interacting spin ½ photons and let them propagate at the speed of c in opposite directions. They are yet at the exact same place in time! And too, they are yet in the exact same place of the fourth expanding dimension.

Why does time stop at the speed of light?
Time depends on the emission and propagation of photons. If no photons are emitted, time does not occur. This holds true whether the clock is an unwinding copper spring, a biological system such as a heart, or an oscillating quartz crystal. No photom emission=no time! As an object approaches the speed of light, its ability to emit photons without reabsorbing them diminishes. An object traveling at the speed of light cannot emit a photon.

How come a photon does not age?
A photon represents momenergy rotated entirely into the fourth expanding dimension. A photon stays the exact same place in the fourth dimension, no matter how far it travels. A photon stays the exact same place in time, no matter how far it travels. Again, time is not the fourth dimension, but in inherits properties of the fourth dimension.

Why are inertial mass and gravitational mass the same thing?

Why do moving bodies exhibit length contraction?
Movement is always accompanied by a shortening in length. This is because the only way for a body to move is for it to undergo a rotation into the forth dimension, which is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions. The more energy an electron has, the more photons it possesses, and the higher probability it exists in the expanding fourth dimension. Hence its length appears contracted as perceived from the three spatial dimensions.

Why are mass and energy equivalent?
The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions. That means that a baseball sitting on a lab table stationary in our three-dimensional inertial reference frame, is yet moving at a fantastic velocity relative to the fourth dimension. Hence every seemingly stationary mass has a vast energy, as given by E=mc2. In a nuclear reaction matter is rotated into the expanding fourth dimension, appearing as high-enegry photons (gamma rays) propagating at the same velocity of the fourth expanding dimension-c.

Why does time's arrow point in the direction it points in? The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions. Hence every photon naturally expands in a spherically symmetric manner. Hence every electron, or piece of matter that interacts with photons, is naturally carried outward from a central point in a spherically symmetric manner. Hence the particles in a drop of dye in a swimming pool dissipate in a spherically symmetric manner, and are never reunited. Hence time's arrow and entropy.

Why do photons appear as spherically-symmetric wavefronts traveling at a velocity c? The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions at the velocity c. Hence photons, which are tiny packets of momenergy rotated entirely into the fourth dimension, appear as spherically-symmetric wavefronts propagating at the velocity c.

Why is there a minus sign in the following metric?
x^2+y^2+z^2-c^2t^2=s^2
The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions at the velocity c. Hence the only way to stay still in the space-time continuum, and to achieve a 0 interval, is to move with the velocity of light.

What deeper reality underlies Einstein's postulates of relativity?
The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions at the velocity c. This single postulate assures that the speed of light is constant for all observers and that the laws of physics are the same in all inertial frames.

What deeper reality underlies Newton's laws?
Newton's laws are an approximation of relativity and quantum mechanics, and as MDT underlies QM & relativity, it underlies Newton's laws.

Why is an increase in velocity always accompanied by a decrease in length as measured by an external observer? All increases in velocity are accompanied by rotations into the fourth dimension. All particles can be represented by momenergy 4-vectors. The greater the momenrgy component in the expanding fourth dimension, the greater the velocity and speed of the particle. Rest mass is the invariant here. It never changes. It prefers the three spatial dimensions. In order for it to move, one must gain energy in the form of photons. These photons prefer the fourth expanding dimension. The more photons one adds, the greater the component of the momenergy 4-vector that appears in the fourth expanding dimension, the more energy the particle has, the shorter it appears, and the faster it moves.

How MDT Is Aiding Fellow Physicists

"The conclusions from Bell's theorem are philosophically startling; either one must totally abandon the realistic philosophy of most working scientists or dramatically revise our concept of space-time." -Abner Shimony and John Clauser

Moving Dimensions Theory provides this new concept of space-time. The vast ambitions of most tenure-track physicists, including string theorists and LQG hypers, causes them to focus on irrelevant, minute questions, and thus, though funded by millions for over thirty years, have not yet been able to string the bow. Deeper, true physicists, such as Abner Shimony and John Clauser are alert to the fact that physics need news ideas.
The expanding fourth dimension gives rise to non-local phenomena and quantum entanglement, as the expanding fourth dimension means that two events separated in the three spatial dimensions can yet appear to be at the exact same place in the fourth dimension. MDT thus provides the new concept of space-time.

"For me, then, this is the real problem with quantum theory: the apparently essential conflict between any sharp formulation and fundamental relativity. It may be that a real synthesis of quantum and relativity theories requires not just technical developments but radical conceptual renewal." -John Bell

Moving Dimensions Theory provides this radical conceptual renewal. The expanding fourth dimension gives rise to non-local phenomena and quantum entanglement, as the expanding fourth dimension means that two events separated in the three spatial dimensions can yet appear to be at the exact same place in the fourth dimension. MDT thus provides the new concept of space-time.

"Entanglement is not one but rather the characteristic trait of quantum mechanics." -Erwin Schrodinger

The expanding fourth dimension gives rise to non-local phenomena and quantum entanglement, as the expanding fourth dimension means that two events separated in the three spatial dimensions can yet be at the exact same place in the fourth dimension. MDT thus provides the new concept of space-time.

"For me, then, this is the real problem with quantum theory: the apparently essential conflict between any sharp formulation and fundamental relativity. It may be that a real synthesis of quantum and relativity theories requires not just technical developments but radical conceptual renewal." -John Bell

Moving Dimensions Theory provides this radical conceptual renewal. The expanding fourth dimension gives rise to non-local phenomena and quantum entanglement, as the expanding fourth dimension means that two events separated in the three spatial dimensions can yet appear to be at the exact same place in the fourth dimension. MDT thus provides the new concept of space-time.

"Entanglement is not one but rather the characteristic trait of quantum mechanics." -Erwin Schrodinger

The expanding fourth dimension gives rise to non-local phenomena and quantum entanglement, as the expanding fourth dimension means that two events separated in the three spatial dimensions can yet be at the exact same place in the fourth dimension. MDT thus provides the new concept of space-time.

http://physicsmathforums.com

[astro]

The transporter dude will be playing Garrett Lisi in the next movie.

[Epsilon=One]

THE GENERAL POSTULATE
OF DYNAMIC DIMENSIONS THEORY
The fourth dimension is expanding relative to the three spatial dimensions.

If at first the idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it.
-Albert EinsteinThe absurdity of undefined terms being a part of a “GENERAL POSTULATE” cannot possibly be the absurdity that Einstein had “hope for.” Such a postulate is truly an absurdity.

But after thirty years of the absurdity of String Theory, millions of dollars from the NSF, and billions of complementary dollars from tax and tuition and endowments spent on killing physics and indie physicists, perhaps it's time for something that makes sense-for a physical theory that actually accounts for a deeper reality from which both Relativity and Quantum Mechanics, from which time, entanglement, gravity, entropy, interference, the constant speed of light, relativistic time dilation, length contraction, and the equivalence of mass and energy emerge. It's time for Moving Dimensions Theory-MDT.The absurdity of String Theory (ST) is not the “strings” that are closer to the truth than the fundamental visualizations offered by Relativity’s space-time continuum or Quantum Mechanics’ "fractional charge" quarks. The absurdity is ST’s attempt to unify metaphysical standard model forces.

I can find nothing in MDT that does not exacerbate the foibles of academic, theoretical physicists.

[astro]

"And how often does it not happen that the proud and conceited judgment of an expert is put in its proper place by a layman! Numerous inventors built 'impossible' machines. Lawyers show again and again that an expert does not know what he is talking about. Scientists, especially physicians, frequently come to different results so that it is up to the relatives of the sick person (or the inhabitants of a certain area) to decide by vote about the procedure to be adopted. How often is science improved, and turned into new directions by non-scientific influences! it is up to us, it is up to the citizens of a free society to either accept the chauvinism of science without contradiction or to overcome it by the counterforce of public action. Public action was used against science by the Communists in China in the fifties, and it was again used,, under very different circumstances, by some opponents of evolution in California in the seventies. Let us follow their example and let us free society from the strangling hold of an ideologically petrified science just as our ancestors freed us from the strangling hold of the One True Religion!"

From "Against Method" by Paul Feyerabend

[Shaxiamaile]

thank you i see its site later

[sunman423]

My friend was having touble with a diff eq math problems and he sent it to this website and within hours he had a written solution. It was actually pretty impresive. www.physicsben.com